far from science
by starwitness
Summary: "it was the strangest feeling, holding another human being's body that close to her after so many years. she hadn't remembered what contact had felt like. the sight of a chest rising and falling that wasn't her own had slipped her mind" (a very self-indulgent portal 2 au)
1. Chapter 1

For a while, the woman is silent.

Chell imagines she must feel completely overwhelmed given the circumstances, as she finds herself still reeling from Wheatley's sudden betrayal. And the air down here feels wet and hot and smothering, they're completely lost and have been for longer than she cares to think about. So there's that, or she could just be angry. Which would also make a decent amount of sense.

Chell is furious, herself. The only thing keeping the blind rage at bay is the paralyzing fear that she may never make it out of the facility alive, at this rate. Wheatley had _told her, _he had _promised her _that they would work together. She has such a distant, faded memory of loyalty that made it so easy to just listen to him, follow him dumbly around the overgrown halls of Aperture that she used to know so well. And when she thinks about his laughter that boomed out of the chassis, the pure fascination with power that dissolved into drunken hunger, she thinks she might be grieving something. A friendship lost. The last ounce of hope she had allowed herself, crushed into rubble.

And he had wanted to _kill her. _That's what she assumes, at least. There's no conceivable way he could have expected her to survive a fall like that, especially with the added weight of another person. She wonders how deep a robot's conscious can go. If they can feel any grief or regret. Maybe he's already erased her from his mind. Gotta save room for all the secrets of the universe. No time to make friends.

She doesn't know how many hours have passed since they've been above ground. Maybe it's been longer. It's hard to tell when the lights are so dim, when there's nothing to eat or to drink. Chell already misses her coveted cans of expired beans as her stomach growls painfully. She's even started to long for the stiff, bleached sheets over top the bed in her suspension room. Her first experiences in Aperture seem like a luxury compared to this. A searing turret bullet to the back of the calf would almost be preferable to wandering aimlessly in the equivalent of a muggy, rubble-filled swamp.

The woman beside her coughs weakly, shutting her eyes. She stops for a moment, throwing a hand out to her side to steady herself against a large chunk of shrapnel. Chell finds herself angry, terrified that they'll lose time. Wheatley could gas this whole part of the facility with neurotoxin, he could blow it up with a nuclear bomb, he - well. There's a chance he has no idea that it exists, either. Sure, he has power now, but the stupidity seems to be hanging around as well. Either way, Chell sighs audibly and taps her foot against the ground. The woman glances up at her through a curtain of thick hair, looking like a wounded animal.

They eye each other.

Then she rights herself up and starts to move again, dragging her feet.

When they were falling through the elevator shaft, Chell had no choice but to grab her and tuck her against her chest. She was light and unnervingly limp, head lolling back, and it was the strangest feeling, holding another human being's body that close to her after so many years. She hadn't remembered what contact had felt like. The sight of a chest rising and falling that wasn't her own had slipped her mind. It had always been her, alone. There was a constant unconscious need to be selfish, because if she was thinking about anything other than keeping herself alive, she would be on the ground with a bullet through her brain, or drowning in a pool of liquid chemicals. As they landed together on the hard ground, the shock that reverberated through her boots was more profound and jolting than she had ever felt alone. It had felt like the start of something new.

The first few hours of wandering through piles of flaming rubble, she could barely keep herself conscious, and Chell had to support her with an arm around her waist. Her eyes were unfocused and had a glazed look to them, her limbs would tremble from the simple task of holding herself up. She was pathetic. Almost laughable. And in any other situation, Chell _would _have laughed, but she figured she probably looked just as exhausted herself, so she kept her face stoic, and her own body steady.

They've appeared to have found some semblance of direction now. They walk beneath massive, concrete structures, suspended in the air, intertwined and marked up with yellow paint. Chell tips her head up to get a better view, walking backward. They're in front of a smaller building with the words, _condemned testing area, _and it should increase the feeling of apprehension in Chell's stomach, but she feels the urge to push forward when she sees the message. She portals herself and the woman up to a high walkway, drops back down to the ground from the other side, and sets to work following a pipeline through more heaps of wreckage. The light gets dimmer and the space even more vast, until whatever internal mantra that was keeping her going settles into crushing silence.

There's a lever. Right in front of her, the handle rusted tight to its control panel, just waiting to be switched downwards, no doubt to present her with some kind of twisted puzzle to solve. The woman watches Chell carefully, glances at the lever and then back up to her, but careful to not appear too interested.

This is what her life has become, then. She is so goddamn desperate for compassion, absolutely starving for it, that she will trust a robot that is most likely rooted in some way to the AI that tried to kill her in the very beginning. She will ignore every tiny sign of its betrayal, instead daydream about fresh air and deer and fields of corn. She will assist in the awakening of the AI, succumb to its sick urge to test her, and eventually find herself _literally _spiraling out of control down an elevator shaft, and becoming more lost than she's ever been before.

Chell pulls the lever. Yanks it down with the most force that she can muster, shattering the rust around it and urging herself forward, down two steps, back onto the ground, where a _massive,_ vault-like door is suddenly illuminated in front of her.

There are two small control booths, lifting against the walls on either side of the chamber, marked one and two. Chell secures the woman to her side and they portal upwards to number one, and _that _is officially the last she can do for the time being. She all but collapses against the wall, letting out a deep sigh, and begins to loosen the straps to her boots. Her portal gun is tossed to the middle of the floor, her tank top straps are pushed down off her shoulders from where they've left ugly marks in her skin.

Chell looks towards the woman. Her expression is the same as it has been, a confusing mix of exhaustion, shame, and burning hatred. She watches Chell massage her calves, take her ponytail down and run a hand through her greasy hair. Chell motions for her to sit. She feels like she's being examined, like the woman is storing all these observations in some corner of her brain that she can use to her advantage later. But she does sit, after another moment of staring. Turns her back to Chell, relaxes her shoulders in what seems like spite. Whatever it takes, she supposes. They'll both be better off with some rest.


	2. Chapter 2

_a/n: hi! this story is really stretching the portal logic but it's been on my mind forever so i wanted to finally start writing it. i'm aiming for weekly updates but we'll see how that goes. hope you're enjoying so far :)_

She dreams of Wheatley, because, from the beginning, sleep has never truly been an escape from reality, just a hazy rehashing of whatever is at the front of her brain.

Initially, Chell was wary to trust him. She had the sinking feeling that he was trying to confuse her, get her lost, and that she'd suddenly find herself descending towards a flaming death like She had tried to get away with so many years before. But he hadn't ever lied. And when they walked together, his little body would rotate around to make sure she was following him, and it made her chest ache just a little bit. As much as she hates to admit it to herself, the warm blue of his optic blinking slowly at her felt like a lifeline that he was throwing out. He seemed capable of it sometimes, saving her.

Chell had even entertained the idea of bringing him with her to the surface. Getting them both the hell out of Aperture. Once, when they rested together in an abandoned, unmoving elevator, he had let her cradle him, curl her body around the warmth of his core. It was freezing cold, and she never would have reached for him otherwise. She remembers him saying it felt _strange. _But he never told her to let go.

That just makes her _miss him. _In her dream, they are running from something, she is holding onto him but he keeps getting heavier and heavier, weighing her down, making her slow. Chell is panicking, trying so hard to balance him in her arms. And he's laughing, that same evil, distorted laugh that made her sick and terrified and so completely regretful that she ever put her trust in someone that she didn't know.

It's a back and forth of her own anger, really. Chell cannot fully decide who she hates more, Wheatley or herself. For some reason, GLaDOS is out of the equation.

Chell wakes up with a start. Her arms ache like she really was carrying something heavy, and she is reminded of the woman beside her. Chell turns her head against the wall, watching her sleep, eyelashes fluttering against her cheeks and chest stuttering unevenly. She breathes like she doesn't fully remember how to, like she's trying to learn again. Chell wonders if she'll die.

She had been standing inside the elevator, paralyzed with fear, as the front section of GLaDOS's optic cracked open like an egg, the woman's limp body falling out onto the chamber floor in a faded orange jumpsuit. Wheatley's desperate attempts to maintain the steely demeanor of a new leader faltered as the woman had gasped, sounding like she was coming up from a deep body of water. She lost consciousness again seconds after, and Wheatley had dropped her inside of the elevator with Chell. She still has bits of broken glass in her hair.

She is not an android. Everything about her is completely human, completely real. But it's strange, because Chell cannot tell if she is old or young. Her face looks like it has been preserved and polished, like any blemishes have been erased. She is beautiful in an eerie way.

Chell forces herself to stand. Her legs burn from what she can guess is the sheer magnitude of her fall. She knows her boots and how much they can withstand, but that landing down the elevator shaft was enough to test their limits. She leaves them off as she pads around the tiny control booth, hands hovering over the manual override button. Chell knows what to do, press them both within a number of seconds, just like any other test that she's painfully familiar with. She could just do it right now, navigate through the vault, find her way back up to Wheatley, decide somehow if she wants to kill him or try to reason with him.

But before she can press the buttons and make her escape, become the selfish, abandoning monster that GLaDOS always told her she was, the woman behind her stirs, and Chell whips around to watch her eyes flicker open and take in her surroundings.

"So," her voice is quiet, lacking malice, but has a lilt that Chell is all too familiar with. "How are you holding up? Because I-" she looks down at her hands, shakes her head. "I have no idea what he did to me."

Chell looks at her carefully. She doesn't seem scared like the way she looked before, just disoriented, maybe residually angry.

"Still the silent treatment? Even now? Come on, there's got to be something you can say," She shifts, sits up a little straighter. Chell stares blankly. "No comments about your new best friend, you know, suddenly betraying you? Sending you to your death?" The woman searches her eyes, annoyance settling over her face. "Fine. It's a shame, I was really hoping we could make some sort of connection down here. Maybe resolve our differences, discuss your motives for brutally murdering me, _twice now_, and destroying my facility." Her arms cross over her chest and she sits back against the wall.

So it _is _her. GLaDOS inside of some woman's body. And now she seems to have enough energy to start hurling insults again. Wheatley had been frantically mumbling about a potato battery, a children's science experiment, that he had meant to put her inside of, he just _hadn't gotten the hang of the control system yet. _Maybe that would have been a better idea. Chell could've just fed her to some birds.

"You know," GLaDOS stands, a hand pressed against the wall to steady herself. "I always felt the security cameras had placed a sort of _boundary _between us, before. Testing is much more interesting as a face-to-face interaction. Now I can _actually _monitor you as you rescue us. Won't this be _fun?_"

_Who said I'm rescuing the both of us? _Chell wants to tell her, but reaches for her boots instead, starts pulling them on in silence. GLaDOS's smile fades.

"I guess it's worth asking, since I've done so much for you in the past - it doesn't seem completely fair for you to take the boots _and _the gun, wouldn't you say? I did give them to you in the first place."

Chell turns and scowls at her, snatches the portal gun from the ground. She shoots an orange portal at the far wall inside of the second control booth, and a blue portal behind GLaDOS, who jumps a little at the sound.

"Fine. Don't try to prove to me that you're any less than selfish. What's the use of that anyway? I already think the worst of you." The combination of her icy words and her weak voice is incredibly strange. She seems uncomfortable without the safety of her old body, there's nothing to hide behind anymore.

Chell steps through her portal and motions for GLaDOS to press the override button next to her, which she does with a scowl.

"Oh, I see. I get to be your assistant. What an _honor._"

The second button is pushed down and before GLaDOS can add in another annoyed comment, an alarm sounds, the noise booming through the open chamber. Chell winces and covers her ears until it stops, the vault fully lifted, revealing a small door. The two women glance at each other and then hurry out of the control booth and down to the floor of the chamber.

Chell hesitates at the door. It could lead to a way out and back to Wheatley, or it could just bring her further into the depths of the facility.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" GLaDOS stands at her side, narrowing her eyebrows. "You've already done so much damage, it really can't get much worse by going through this door. Besides, I think I can try to navigate us through. I'm starting to remember where we are."

She wonders how that's possible. There must have been decades of memories stored inside of GLaDOS's mainframe, how can they still be with her after the transfer? Plus, Chell has no idea if she can trust her. It would be stupid to put her faith into yet another robot.

But then again, she's not a robot anymore.

Chell pushes open the door.


	3. Chapter 3

_a/n: hi again! hope you enjoy, i really like this chapter :)_

Ahead of them is a long hallway, the floors and walls sunken in with water damage. Their footsteps squish on the ground, and Chell hurries to the end of the hall to push open the second metal door, one hand gripping the end of her portal gun tightly. What they are met with once it creaks open before them takes Chell's breath away momentarily.

A vast, sweeping chamber, completely flooded with water. Chell looks up to the ceiling, but the room doesn't seem to end, a dense fog collecting near what she thinks could be the top. Large metal structures have been torn down and lay collapsed in the water, which a nearby poster board identifies as "dangerous!" GLaDOS shows no sign of recognition, but she appears stunned into silence and steps carefully along the metal walkway that guides them further through the chamber. Chell lets her get ahead for a few paces, her neck still craned to map out the space. It doesn't seem like there are very many options besides following the catwalk.

Eventually, they come to a large, steel door that looks like it has been forcibly pried open, splitting the concrete of the wall. Chell carefully aims a blue portal inside the gap, and an orange to her right. GLaDOS gingerly steps through first, not waiting for her. She walks like she's being ushered forward by something Chell cannot see. But she continues to follow instead of lead her, not wanting to do anything to make her angry or mention Wheatley again. She's already in a bad position, still looking fairly exhausted. The best possible option seems to be leaving her alone as much as she possibly can.

They're in another hallway. Chell huffs, a little frustratedly. Everything about this place seems like it's hiding something. The sheer and unnecessary amount of entrances is enough to make her decently suspicious. It looks like it was designed specifically to be boarded up at any given notice, to lead someone away. She follows GLaDOS through a second door.

And then, looking ahead, she thinks, _oh._ _Of course. _

A massive logo suspended from the ceiling that reads, _Aperture Science Innovators_ towers before them. And as they work their way up to the front of the space, it is like an invisible wire has been crossed, and suddenly a man's voice booms through the chamber.

_Welcome, gentlemen to Aperture Science!_

He speaks confidently, introduces himself as Cave Johnson, CEO of the company. Chell stands, practically transfixed by the sheer conviction he speaks with, and listens to the duration of his message. He's welcoming test subjects. Astronauts, war heroes, Olympians. A loud and hopeful song plays over his voice. Chell suddenly imagines the space in its prime. Devoid of the wreckage and dirt and vines snaking up the walls. A crowd of strong, ambitious men stepping forward, standing where she is. It's not hard to picture at all.

A woman's voice chimes in on the recording. Sweet, agreeable, and equally confident. Cave calls her Caroline, says that she's _the backbone of the facility. Married to science. _What a statement.

GLaDOS stands a little ahead of her still. She stares up at the logo, then to the right where what looks like a small office sits. The catwalks are ripped down, and once Cave is finished speaking, Chell shoots a portal at the far wall where she can see a wire beam sitting. She figures she can gain enough momentum to land near the office that GLaDOS is fixated on if she jumps to the ground below and angles herself just right. Chell walks forward, figuring GLaDOS will follow her. She doesn't. Her arms are wrapped tightly around her middle like she's trying to hold herself together. Her body trembles faintly like it did before, and Chell wonders if she's getting weaker again, what could have caused it.

It hits her, after a moment.

For the second time, she finds herself thinking, _of course. _It's the same eager voice from the recording. Even though her tone was smothered with malice back inside the control booth where they rested, there is no mistaking it. Chell looks at her again, closer. Caroline, the backbone of Aperture, and she has pretty brown eyes and a growing flush over her cheeks and she looks like she may scream or cry or pass out on the concrete beneath her.

It's incredible, how well the chassis has preserved her body. Chell has relatively no idea how the technology works, but her face fits her voice. She looks older, sure, but Chell can see the ghost of an eager assistant if she squints. After the initial fascination, though, the real question dawns on her, and everything starts to sink in. She lowers her portal gun, steps back from the task at hand. How could the "lovely Caroline" have become such a monster? So dead set on murder and revenge, everything she says so full of rage and spite?

What happened to her? _Who _happened to her?

Chell touches her shoulder, somehow less afraid of her words. The recording gave her practically nothing to work with, but now there's vulnerability, there's a secret uncovered that never would have been brought to light if they were not down here together.

Caroline looks at her. She sighs, deeply, eyes shifting downwards. The flush in her cheeks has calmed slightly, and whatever expression that had painted her face moments before is gone.

"Well," she says, and her voice is softer. "Now I can say for sure that I completely know where we are."

They move together, after that. Chell grabs her arm once they are atop the beam, steadying her so she doesn't fall through one of the gaps. Then they both stare at each other because if it were her alone, Chell would jump through the blue portal that she has on the ground and sail cleanly through the air onto the cement foundation where the building is. But Caroline is not wearing boots, and then Chell remembers how close she had held her in the elevator shaft and how she could practically hear her heart thudding in her ears.

"Okay, so this isn't ideal," Caroline glances around like she's trying to find something to help her. Obviously, there's nothing. "Well, you're strong, right? And I'm assuming you didn't drag me through the dirt to get us through here before," Chell nods. "I have an idea once we get over there, but just pick me up for now and we'll both pretend like it's not uncomfortable." So she scoops her up, rather ungracefully, and she hears her heart beating and beating again. Caroline brushes her hair over one shoulder so it doesn't blind Chell's view, and then she plunges off of the beam, not knowing which thing she should cling tighter to, her gun or the woman that could possibly get her out of here.

But she manages to keep a good hold on both, and they land solidly on the other end of the chamber. Caroline quickly clambers out of Chell's arms and tentatively walks forward through the door. Again, she acts like something is pulling her, but at the same time, she seems a little reluctant.

_There's a thousand tests performed every day here in our enrichment spheres - _

Another recording starts as they walk into what looks like a lobby. Caroline bristles at the sound, glancing down at the floor, looking increasingly anxious. But before she can try to usher them on, something catches Chell's eye. To the left, there's a display case, with various awards and certificates placed behind faded glass. _Shower Curtain Salesman of 1943, Local Entrepreneur Buys Salt Mine, Best New Science Company… _It seems like a rapid escalation to success. Chell squints, tries to read as much of the articles as she can, but the lettering is worn and hard to make out, and she turns back to the lobby. The recording has stopped, and Caroline looks relieved. She glances around the room with a distant expression, looking at the dust-covered couches and the tacky wallpaper. Then she starts walking again. Chell follows, and they come to the end of another catwalk. Luckily, it's much less of a distance to the other side, and they jump down separately to an elevator shaft.

Cave starts talking again, his voice echoing even louder as they enter the elevator. He's saying something about Mantis Men and Repulsion Gel, and Caroline tenses her shoulders, hugs her arms around herself like she was doing before. Chell wishes there was a way to turn the recordings off, but she figures it's too unrealistic to ever hope for a testing experience that's completely silent. And Caroline is responsible for their escape now, and she's visibly uncomfortable, which makes Chell worry that she'll be distracted throughout their journey.

Surprisingly, the elevator still works, and once they reach the top, Caroline has composed herself once again and starts circling the tower. She points to a far ledge with two metal doors, and Chell follows her eyes.

"If you can put a portal there, at the top where it slants a little, we can get to the Repulsion Gel room. Which, well, you'll understand what it is once we get inside," she walks to the other end of the catwalk, looking down the empty elevator shaft. "This is our best bet to gain enough speed to get us across. And," she blushes, barely noticeable. "You'll have to hang onto me again. I'm certain there's a prototype pair of your boots somewhere, but they must be deeper into the facility. I promise you won't have to do this the whole time we're here."

Chell finds herself not really minding. It's funny how much Caroline's demeanor has changed since they've gotten to this point. The angry creases in her face are gone. She's calm and quiet and doesn't look like she's thinking of any scathing insults to try to save her dignity with. It's a nice change. Strange, though.

She listens to the advice, scooping Caroline into her arms again and shooting her portals with extra precision. In seconds, they are landing on another catwalk across from a door with the words _Alpha Station _painted in blue and white above it. Caroline stops Chell before she can enter, placing a hand in the middle of her chest. They both glance down at it, but she doesn't move.

"Listen, I know you like to do things your own way, and I'm sure you've had quite enough of me by now, but I really think I can get us out of here and back up to Wheatley," she breaks eye contact and gazes at the vastness of the chamber around them. "It's not going to be easy for me, for reasons I don't think I can tell you right now. But if we work together we can do it. And," Caroline looks back at her, her eyes sparkling and the hint of a smile at the corner of her mouth. "Obviously you have no real reason to trust me, I get that. The best thing I can offer you is my word. I want my facility back, and you want to leave for good, so if we make it in one piece, you're free to go. Deal?"

The last thing Chell would ever expect to hear from her is a promise. But, when she considers it, she believes that she's telling the truth. And she's _fascinated, _too. By this woman that stands before her, and because, for some strange reason, Chell feels like she knows this place too. The few hundred years in suspension have put a dense fog over her memory so she cannot be sure. But there's something about it that feels strangely familiar, the deeper she goes. So Chell finds herself nodding, smiling even, just a little. She is exhausted and angry and deeply confused, but for once, she feels like her and this woman have the same idea in mind. Caroline puts out her hand, and Chell grasps it, shaking firmly. _Deal. _


	4. Chapter 4

Repulsion Gel takes a few attempts for Chell to get used to. Up until now, she has prided herself on her agility, her resilience. It never took her long to solve GLaDOS's tests, since, after a while, she started to catch on to her methods and designs. Line of turrets to the left, cube dispenser near the exit, blue portal here and orange portal there… It was a system that her brain just became accustomed to. She never thought it would be something she would miss, though.

After navigating through the inner workings of the facility and stumbling through the first test chamber, Chell feels decently frustrated and her arms are significantly more sore than they've been in a long time from carrying Caroline like her bride. She gingerly lowers herself onto a metal staircase outside of the second test chamber and takes a few breaths. She feels the stairs rattle as Caroline sits down above her.

The version of Aperture that they fell from is far from comforting, but Chell thinks that she prefers it to this. There's a strange and heavy feeling that has settled itself in her chest, and the deeper they go, the stronger it gets. Watching Caroline shut her eyes and curl in on herself every time Cave Johnson's messages play is still distracting as well. She reacts like she's in physical pain, like she's trying to will something away but cannot. Chell finds herself wanting to feel bad for her but simultaneously attempting to remain impartial. She cannot trust as easily as she trusted Wheatley. Though she is smaller and softer spoken, Chell knows that the part of Caroline that had wanted to kill her is not completely gone. Just muffled, maybe. Sure, they've made a deal, but what comes after that? Chell would be far from surprised if, after regaining control of the facility, Caroline resorted back to her homicidal tendencies. She doesn't know if she can handle another slow rise of the elevator and the crushing plunge back to the ground that followed.

Needless to say, she hasn't experienced a dilemma like this before. Chell considers herself a neutral person. She stays out of trouble, does what she is told. It's just easier that way. She was never one to fight the system, at least until the system started trying to fight her. But even after that, she just fulfilled whatever tasks were put in front of her. When Wheatley said to follow him, she followed him. If GLaDOS had pulled her back into another round of testing in the middle of their escape, she might have just conceded and fallen back into place. The idea of true freedom seems too large and impossible to comprehend. Sure, it is the ideal alternative, but what would she _do _with herself? She hasn't spoken actual words for as long as she can remember, she knows virtually nothing about her past, and all of her skills are in the vein of basic and instinctual survival. So there's a part of her that wants to stay, as terrifying as it is to admit it. It makes more sense than trying to build a new life for herself out of pieces that she would just be grasping at.

Caroline clears her throat and Chell jumps, not realizing that she had put her head down while she was thinking. She turns and Caroline looks at her, eyes wide.

"Sorry to interrupt," she starts. "But we should probably keep moving. I can try to guide you through this next chamber if you think it would help." She looks like she has been deep in thought as well. Her hair is tousled and her hands twist nervously in her lap. Chell gives her a long look, not really wanting to concede this early. But in the interest of saving as much time as possible, she nods and stands.

_For this next test, we put nanoparticles in the gel. _

"_God,"_ Caroline growls as they cross the line into the next test. Another voice recording is triggered, and Cave rambles on into a spiel about RNA and tumors that sounds mildly concerning. She runs her hands up and down her arms uncomfortably. "I _should _expect these," she speaks over him as she surveys the test chamber. "He loved to hear himself talk," Chell turns to her, surprised. This is the first time she's actually said anything about him. "It was beyond stressful because most of the things that came out of his mouth were lawsuits waiting to happen," she rolls her eyes and then seems to snap out of the memory as the recording fades to silence. "Um, anyway, you'll need to get the cube using that platform to your left. It should open up a panel for you over there," she points, her arm brushing over Chell's shoulder, who shivers at the contact. "Then we can jump down onto the gel and the momentum should push us into the next phase of the test."

It takes a moment for Chell to break into action, and as she is retrieving the cube, she wonders what to make of Caroline's words. From the first recording, she had assumed Cave was at least a little arrogant based on the tone of his voice, but it's still interesting to hear Caroline confirm it, and she wonders how much more she'll end up revealing. Chell supposes that also ensures that he'll be talking over the rest of the tests, which is unfortunate, to say the least.

The older cubes are much heavier than the ones she's used to handling, and the magnetic field in the portal gun won't attach to them, so she has to grab and carry them herself. As she lugs the cube to the button, her legs buckle suddenly from the weight, and she hits the floor, sliding ungracefully across the Repulsion Gel. It throws her onto an empty platform and she lies there, the wind completely knocked out of her chest.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" She hears Caroline call from the entrance. Chell keeps her head pressed against the floor until she can take a full breath. Embarrassment floods through her, a feeling she is hardly familiar with. She's lost her footing plenty of times in other test chambers, exhaustion or fear consuming her and clouding her mind. But it was rare that GLaDOS would react, maybe the occasional offhand comment about her weight throwing her off-balance, though, if it did happen, Chell never found herself dwelling on it. But the deep concern in Caroline's voice makes her wish she was invisible, if only for a few minutes. She turns to give her some kind of signal that she's alive, trying not to look like she's in too much pain, even though her chest feels like it's on fire. She's taken a few careful steps away from the emancipation grill and looks anxiously at Chell. "You know, I can put a little more effort into helping you, if you want. I figured it'd be better if I stayed out of your way, but if you need me to carry that…" she trails off as Chell stands and lifts the cube again, shaking her head roughly. "Fair enough." Caroline crosses her arms over her chest and resumes her position at the entrance.

Chell can accept a guide through the facility, but _actually _working with Caroline seems a little too much for her, at least right now. She knows herself well enough to recognize the stubbornness, but it's hard not to become so self-reliant when she's always alone. Caroline doesn't seem too angry about it though, which she's grateful for. It'll just take some adjusting to, then maybe she'll let her touch the portal gun.

They make it out of the second chamber without any more injuries and Chell manages to salvage some of her pride when she figures out the next phase without any word from Caroline. Another message from Cave crackles to life as they stand in the elevator, and he says something about Repulsion Gel "not liking the human skeleton." Chell glances down at her jumpsuit, which is thoroughly covered in it, and then looks slowly up at Caroline.

"Oh, that's true," she says thoughtfully. "I'm sure the toxicity has worn off by now, it's been so many years. We only had three reported casualties anyway, nothing too serious," Caroline has a far off expression and Chell watches her warily. She sounds like she's reporting something, and seems to catch herself before she goes on, blinking rapidly. "Sorry. I don't even know how I remember that."

They move on. Chell decides that it's best not to push her to keep talking. If her memories are coming back this fast, she'll probably have more to say soon enough.

More Repulsion Gel. More voice recordings. More worrying silence from Caroline. She seems like she's trying to keep herself quiet now, and hardly speaks beyond simple directions to guide Chell through the tests. She has an even, guarded expression over her face that she tries to maintain, but Chell pretends not to notice it falter every so often.

The boots are nowhere in sight, either. Caroline seems to have forgotten about them for the time being. They take a particularly high jump off a catwalk where Chell has placed Repulsion Gel at the bottom of the drop, and Caroline gasps sharply as they hit it and are thrown into the air. Her hands curl around Chell's shoulders and she presses her face into her neck. Chell almost plunges them into the water out of shock. Her breath on her bare skin and the way she trembles steadily sends chills down her back. There's something about this woman being completely at her mercy that makes Chell feel overwhelmed. She thinks she is starting to realize what is happening, but pushes it away. They _have_ to get back to Wheatley. Then maybe they can address why Caroline lingered after they landed, kept one hand on the back of Chell's neck as she set her down.

The two of them push their way through the rest of the Repulsion Gel tests until an elevator takes them to another lobby where Cave begins to congratulate them on their "glorious contribution to science." Chell is already mapping out the area and shoots one portal at an empty wall, then walks back towards the elevator and looks for any open space beyond the catwalk. The voice recording continues, feedback crackling, filling the empty facility with sound. Chell is tuning it out like she's started to do, her mind working steadily until a woman's voice comes through.

_Goodbye Caroline! _

There's a smile in her tone, Chell can tell. It's strange to picture her with a look on her face that's not angry or wounded. She glances over to Caroline who is standing across from her, and watches as her face slowly pales. She doesn't seem to cope well with hearing her own voice.

"What?" She asks Chell, and the sharp tone has returned. "There's nothing for me to say. Let's just move on."

Chell lowers her gaze. _Sorry. _Maybe she looked too interested. It's hard not to be. The fondness in Cave's voice when he addressed her was unmistakable. Chell wonders if Caroline always supervised him while he recorded the messages, how much time they really spent together. She remembers what Caroline said earlier - _it's not going to be easy for me. _

As they step through a portal together to the Beta section of the facility, Chell is left just as confused as before.


End file.
